“Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get.” This classic quote from “Forrest Gump” rings particularly true for those of us with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Some days, some moments, and even some years are better than others with this disorder, because the challenging reality of OCD is that it doesn’t follow a predictable pattern.
Its themes can shift, its intensity can vary, and its triggers can change over time—sometimes catching us completely by surprise. This can be incredibly frustrating and even scary to go through, especially if you feel you’ve been making progress in managing your symptoms.
However, OCD is a chronic condition, so it’s important to remember that these fluctuations are a common experience, not a sign that you’re doing something wrong. Unexpected triggers can’t erase your progress or your ability to cope—and, most importantly, there are steps you can take to handle them.
OCD triggers: What they are and why they happen
A trigger is something that elicits a strong or unexpected emotional response, or causes you to relive a past trauma. Everyone experiences them, but in OCD specifically, a trigger tends to be anything—a sight, a sound, a situation, or even a memory—that sets off an intrusive thought, image, urge, or sensation.
Sometimes we might know exactly why something triggered us, and other times it might seem to come out of nowhere. But regardless of why we are triggered, we usually will start to feel anxiety, distress, or other uncomfortable feelings creep in. Your heart might race, your hands might shake, or you might feel sick to your stomach, and your instincts might tell you to run away, distract yourself, or do something to make the feeling stop.
Even though your body might be reacting like there’s real danger, OCD triggers usually aren’t connected to actual threats. Still, they tend to feel so real—because the truth is, with OCD, the feelings are incredibly real, even when the threat isn’t. That’s what can make triggers so confusing.
What to do when you’re triggered
This might sound counterintuitive, but running away from triggers usually isn’t the answer. In fact, facing them head-on is the best way to decrease the power they have over you. That’s because the anxiety we might feel in response to a trigger isn’t the enemy—it’s a normal part of being human that can help keep us safe from real dangers. The goal isn’t to never feel anxious again.
OCD is the enemy here—or more specifically, its habit of weaponizing our discomfort to make us do what it wants. The goal is to practice acknowledging our uncomfortable feelings and allowing them to be present, without doing anything to try to get rid of them.
This helps us learn that every uncomfortable feeling will eventually pass, and that we don’t need to be at OCD’s beck and call. We can keep living our lives and making choices based on our values, not what OCD wants for us. Every time we do this, OCD’s grip on our lives loosens.
Triggers after learning to manage OCD
Living a life in recovery doesn’t mean that you never experience symptoms or feel triggered. No matter how long OCD may have been dormant, it can still pop up occasionally. I’ve seen this throughout the years in my own recovery journey. Sometimes I can feel it coming. Other times, it blindsides me completely.
However, after living with OCD for so long, I’ve gotten better at spotting when my anxiety is creeping up or I feel a little off from baseline, but I’m not perfect at predicting when things are building up to an OCD episode. No one is.
That said, for the past 20 years, I’ve mostly lived in recovery. Getting a proper diagnosis and effective treatment changed my life dramatically, and the years when my OCD ran rampant feel worlds away. Sure, symptoms still show up sometimes, but they no longer dominate my existence like they used to. That’s something I’m deeply grateful for every day.
My recent experience being triggered
The last major OCD flare-up I had happened a little over a year ago, and it really took me by surprise. I had been doing excellent, despite some very personally stressful life events, which I think is why I was particularly taken aback and disheartened. Looking back now, I can see how my stress had been quietly building.
That’s the thing about OCD, though—even when you understand why it’s happening, even when you’re well-versed in managing it, an unexpected trigger can still feel like it’s knocked you off your feet.
The events leading up to this episode were intense. I lost my mom, who had been my best friend throughout my life. OCD had fed on my fear of losing her for a long time, painting detailed pictures of how I wouldn’t be able to cope when it happened. I’d spent six years caring for her as she battled Parkinson’s and Dementia, not long after losing my step-dad to Alzheimer’s, so it had been several years of caretaking and overwhelming stress.
During those years of caregiving, my OCD had actually stayed relatively quiet. I truly thought I had beaten it for good—though deep down, I probably knew better. My reality was spinning more and more out of control, so my mind was just too focused on other things to give space to the OCD thoughts.
Then the episode struck like lightning. It happened while I was on a work trip, alone in an unfamiliar state, and it was nighttime—which has always been when my OCD likes to turn up the volume.
Suddenly, fear flooded through me and my body went into full fight-or-flight mode. All I wanted was to be home, to feel safe again. I needed to not feel this way. It was intolerable. The urge to engage in compulsions was overwhelming. It was like all my years of experience managing OCD, and of teaching others how to manage it, had vanished in an instant.
That is being triggered. It can happen anytime, anywhere. I do not say this to scare you. I say it because it’s so important to know that if and when this happens to you, you’re going through something that so many others also deal with—even those of us who’ve been managing OCD for decades, even those of us who help others with OCD professionally. You are not alone.
Responding with self-compassion
So, why do I share this story? Because I am still here, and the lies that OCD told me in those moments never came to fruition—which shows that eventually, the uncomfortable feelings pass. Yes, triggers can be terrifying, and the threat can feel incredibly real in the moment. But at the end of the day, they’re just feelings—powerful and unpleasant ones, but still just feelings. You didn’t choose to have them, but you do get to choose how to respond to them.
The other hard truth that I think needs to be acknowledged here is that you may not always respond the way you know you need to, even when you know better. And when that happens, you deserve self-compassion.
I wish I could say that I was a perfect model of ERP skills in that moment when I felt triggered—that I did everything by the book and that I resisted all compulsions and urges. But I wasn’t. The truth is that I am human. I am imperfect. We all do the best we can in each given moment, and in that particular moment, I practiced my skills to the best of my ability and I got through it. The next time I’m triggered, I’ll have that experience under my belt and an opportunity to try again.
We are all a work in progress when it comes to recovery. The way I see it, what’s important is that I get it right more times than not. As long as I’m trying, I get stronger with each trigger I face.
Preparing for unexpected triggers
While unexpected triggers can feel overwhelming, I hope you’ll remember that they’re not a sign of defeat—they’re chances to practice and strengthen your ability to handle uncertainty and anxiety. Each time you face one of these challenges, you’re building resilience. With time, proper care, and support, you can learn to face these triggers with increasing confidence.
An OCD-specialty therapist trained in exposure and response prevention (ERP) can help you transform these challenging moments into opportunities for growth. They can teach you specific techniques for managing unexpected triggers, work with you to develop a personalized treatment plan for your specific symptoms and triggers, and support you as you build confidence in your ability to face whatever OCD throws your way.
At NOCD, all of our therapists are specialty-trained in OCD and ERP therapy by world-renowned experts. In addition to their extensive training, they also undergo rigorous testing before working with our members to ensure they’re equipped with the skills and knowledge to help you take your life back.
Book a free 15-minute call with our team to learn more about getting matched with a NOCD Therapist and getting started with treatment that can help you gain lifelong skills for managing OCD.